God put me to sleep.

That simple. I am writing as someone who has had experience with an entheogenic drug because I feel strongly that people who have experienced the true nature of Gods via altering their consciousness  need to speak out right now and continue to, as the fate of the earth is at stake. We need to talk about the truths we have learned and the lies we have uncovered, brought to us by abrahamic domination of the planet, and patrilineal organization of humanity which originated even before abraham. It seems that all over the globe, cultures everywhere have been on a patrilinealist race to the bottom when it comes to treating women, children, animals, and all aspects of the earth and her environment in the most utilitarian and profitable way possible. There is no regard for the soul or consciousness of that being, there is only utilization for profit. Women become domestic servants or lower-paid workers, children become soldiers or slave laborers in the third world and future ones in the first world. Fewer than ever escape the bounds of the working class and rise to comfortable existence in the upper classes. The middle class shrinks every day and life gets harder than ever for the working class.

I started experimenting with this legal substance out of desperation and despair. I was in my mid-forties and my adult life had been a series of one failure after another. I was ‘scatter-brained’, I couldn’t remember anything or organize my life to be more productive or efficient. I had read every book, tried every method of therapy and anonymous group, every special diet, had beaten the bejesus out of myself with my own disappointment in my lack of ability to succeed. I kept reading about entheogenics like ayuhuasca and ibogaine and wanted badly to give them a try however as someone who’d lived below poverty level my entire life I just couldn’t see a day in which something like that would be possible, so I started researching legal alternatives and lo and behold I found one.

It took many experiences, some very bad and frightening, to give me the understanding to pray for protection from dark spirits when I went into trance on this drug and to also ask the universe to teach me what it wanted me to know and allow me to be brave enough to accept it. Once when I was on the precipice of making a disastrous personal mistake I began to experience direct visits from the ‘god of thunder’ Zeus/Jupiter/God deity who is worshipped as the almighty and fabled to be the only God in two of the three abrahamics. This God disabled my internet with lightening several times in a row, all weekends I was going to be alone and would have spent time online or watching cable…I was rendered completely ‘entertainmentless’ and spent the time in trance instead, during which I was made to think about the decisions I was making and the disasters that could befall me.

What happened was that I began to understand and appreciate the tenderness of this God. He was a disciplinarian, one who called into question my motives and behaviors, unlike his son, Sol, our star, who had the infinitely loving consciousness of a child. It was these two actual deities that christianity had united into ‘the father, the son, and…’. The Holy Spirit, or the Catholic ‘mother of God’ I have met twice now, she is the all powerful ancient female deity whom the humans on earth were temporarily forced to forget, but exist she does, though christians tried to reframe her as a wisp, a ‘spirit’.

I felt nothing from this God but complete love and gentleness and I learned that he wanted what was best for me, but that I didn’t understand as completely as I should that my actions effected other people, and he needed to show me that in some albeit painful ways. I have had fantastical experiences with this God which I will get into in later blogs but this one particular experience exemplifies his power, it was during one of the times when I was trying to figure out which way to go in a process of decision making and he again appeared to me;  as he was showing me some of the potential outcomes of my choices I began to get scared and I communicated this to him. Quickly he said, “Well go to sleep then” and raised his finger in my direction and just as suddenly a completely calm drowiness descended on me and I lay my head down on my two hands like a child drifting off to sleep on a desk at school. I was astounded by this single event as much as any I experienced with God. “Just go to sleep”, he said, and instantaneously I was calm, comforted, and sliding into a nap.

This and many other experiences with God and his cohorts in the stars drive home to me how disadvantaged we are as a human culture to have had astrology and astronomy removed and hidden as the true nature of divinity and holiness. When I trance I can always ‘smell’ the deities coming, the air clears in a way unlike anything earthly and the clean, wonderful smell of holiness approaches; it is golden and pure and unlike any other smell on earth.

At this time on earth we really do not believe in these deities. Not really. We don’t believe in holy gods, we believe in gods of conquest. We believe gods tell us to reduce women to their base functions of breeding and domestic slavery, make automatons of children through brutality and genital mutilation, to use weaker countries for their resources and slave labor. The gods we believe in at this time in human experience demand us to bend everything to our will. The gods we believe in do not love, and this is a travesty when the very real Gods who DO exist ARE love. And the awesome power this God I encountered must wield, to literally reach into my mind and beset me with sleepiness because he cared that I was fearful, is a powerful love I never experienced in all my years of religious indoctrination. I had no idea he loved me so much, was so present at this time on earth, and so moral as to care that the mistakes I was making would cause other people deep pain, and thus affect my position in the afterlife. This God interceded to benefit me.

It is important that people understand that this God while having overlapping qualities with ancient or even abrahamic Gods, is absolutely hip to the moment. One time he appeared to me in the form of Russian poet/singer Andrey Lysikov, wearing blue jeans and converse hi-tops. He takes on a visage similar to that of Santa Claus most of the time, but with modern clothes that are always casual, such as blue jeans and button down shirts. This God has been here an infinite time, long enough to experience the pre-abrahamic world, and will be here an infinite amount of time longer. He is not a relic and does not belong to any of the various and sundry war-mongering death cults. They seek his power, and bastardize his name to suit their purposes, but they will never have it. He will never support their violence or demand they transgress against the fate of their souls in the afterlife by using rape and torture as a means of conquest of the weak and innocent. They do these things to their own detriment, and will atone for them in the next realm. What they have done to his name is unconscionable and tragic.

I had to experience this for myself. My childhood experience of religion was so dark and negative, interspersed w/ violation from predators that no one seemed to want to acknowledge existed or hold accountable, that to me God was an ancient relic of a religion that hated me. Unlike Sol, the star called our sun, I don’t know what form in the universe this God takes. He resembles the Jupiter god of mythology, but back then they knew the god and the planet were the same. I know some have portrayed him as a sky god, or a mountain god, raining down thunder and lightning. Never have I seen his alternative gentle side portrayed, his infinite love so profound he would put a forty-something year old woman down for a nap to calm her fears of what lay in store for her in the future.  God, for sure, is the father of all humanity, and the father of Sol as well…maybe the father of many, many stars. When people say God is Love they are telling ultimate truth, God is Love, the universe is Love, we are loved and made of love as are the beautiful shining stars, which seem to be bright, burning accumulations of love for all to see. It is no wonder the abrahamics stole the study of stars and star gods from humanity…monotheism only works in the daytime, at night one can glance upward to see a sky full of Gods, full of Love, full of compassion, empathy, tenderness we have almost no conception of at this time on earth having been besieged by conqueror cults.

Copyright 2017. Starshine Kerr. All Rights Reserved.




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